16 October 2012

What to Expect When.....the book has gaps....

I knew when I had each one of my children that my life was taking a dramatic change for different. I embraced that different and have tried to be the best mother to my children as I can be. For 10 years now I have never once compared others form of parenting to my own. Sure, I judge at times....(come on we ALL do at some point)...and I am sure others have judged my parental decisions. But, that being said, I have never said "I wish I was more like that mother." I never said this because I have always firmly believed that I was given the perfect children for ME. They aren't perfect and neither am I - but together we can only be perfection. This all sounds like poetry - be patient -  I am getting there....
 
As a new mother I read the books, I even went to the hospital for a lamaze class when I was pregnant with Mya (I couldn't find the room so I left and never took another class....), I watched "A Baby Story" and "Baby's First Day." I was prepared....then you have the child and aside from how to take a temperature and at what level you should be concerned about I discovered I knew nothing. For the record, 10 years later and on my 3rd child I still call my sisters and best friend who are all nurses to ask medical questions. Here is my Stammen "Top 10 Things to Books Don't Tell You."
 
10. Your hair will never be clean....yes that is food, spit-up, dirt, grease, crayon, paper, sticky stuff.
9. It will take approximately 3 days to watch a movie you recorded 4 months ago.
8. Standard shower time single: 20 minutes; with child: 5-10 (depending on if you shave both legs).
7. You can sing every Disney song and secretly enjoy it.
6. Helping with homework, fixing dinner, playing Candyland and feeding an infant at the same time is routine - how else would we get it all done?
5. You got promoted? My kid is potty trained....so take that.
4. I can grocery shop in 30 minutes or 3 hours, just depends on the day, my company, and what is waiting at home.
3. You get creative with potty's after #5 is complete, it could be the side of the road, behind a building, or even a McDonald's bag.
2. A child has sat on your lap while you went to the bathroom. Admit it.
1. You love every moment, even when you are crying from pure sleep deprivation.
 
I want to write more, but I am holding one sleepy boy, typing one handed, telling girl #2 girl (for the 4th time) to get pajamas, listening to girl #1 distract girl #2 with "loving (aka antagonizing) hugs"...time to engage.